So you’ve been trying for a while, and contrary to your best laid (‘scuse the pun) plans and good intentions, you’re still not pregnant. What next?
Having had my own fertility journey, ultimately culminating in an uncomplicated natural birth (following a natural conception) at age 45, I am often asked to share what worked for me.
Once you get to the 6-month mark of attempting to conceive naturally, it’s probably time to see a really good GP and talk to them about your options. They will most likely suggest that you consider your stance on IVF (in vitro fertilisation) treatments and start looking into seeing a fertility expert after some initial test are carried out. Depending on the GP, they could be asking some pretty specific questions about your diet and your lifestyle.
It isn’t the same for any two people on the planet, so please feel your way through and trust your own intuition above all else, Do your own research and follow the advice of those you trust.
This is just one story, and hopefully, it goes some way towards helping women get back into their own body-minds and following their own soul’s voice.
I was told I had super low levels of everything that mattered in relation to fertility (details below*), I had a highly respected fertility doctor in Sydney tell me I was likely infertile and peri-menopausal and I had a swathe of miscarriages. We even tried IVF but to no avail. It was not easy. It was heartbreaking.
Yet, for some inexplicable reason, I felt that there was another child for us, and that feeling didn’t go away. It wasn’t logical, it wasn’t medical, but it was undeniable.
So if you, like me, have that feeling, and are willing to throw everything at it whilst ideally remaining completely unattached to the outcome (easier said than done, I know), then give these ideas a try.
And try your best not to take too much to heart of what you are told without checking in with your own intuition, and doing your own research alongside it (this article included).
Here below are some short points on what worked for me.
1) Find an Arvigo practitioner near you (Mayan Abdominal Therapy), our good friend Andrea Lopez is a teacher and leader in that scene, although she practices from the Sunshine Coast of Australia. These guys work magic on your womb and teach self-care that will last your whole life.
2) Look up The Whole 30 – it is a protocol that involves cutting all inflammatory and hormone disruptive foods from your diet. Well worth doing – trying for babies or not.
3) Go to a fertility-specialising naturopath (preferably by recommendation). If they’re worth their salt, they’ll do some blood tests and go from there. Not cheap I’m afraid. LIkely you’ll find out some stuff about your body and some nutrients required to get it humming.
4) Consider doing yoga/meditation with the direct aim of reducing cortisol (stress) on a daily basis. This is the number-one main fertility blocker we have. I looked at a crew called Pulling Down the Moon in the States who are all over this and have great books and videos.
5) Start getting acupuncture, again from a specialising fertility practitioner. These are not all made equal, so again, try to find a recommendation if you can. Or, as I did, you might have to try a few out and see which one you feel is doing the good-good work. In Sydney, you can’t beat Jane Lyttleton at Paddington Medical Centre. In Bath, I would recommend Dr Huw Griffiths.
6) See an energy-practitioner to check out your state of spiritual health (which could mean a lot of different things to a lot of different people). The two I have worked with are Zoe Dixon and Nancy Valentine Smith. The latter was probably the move pervasive for me along this path; but again, you have to go with your gut. I believe they both work remotely. Tell them I sent you, they are both amazing.
7) Have fun! Drink a glass of wine and enjoy yourself during your fertile window. Schtoop your partner every two days during this time (not daily, as sperm needs time to regroup). Also, bear in mind your key reproductive assets are created 3-months before you use them so that’s at least how long you need to be healthy, not drinking much and for men, taking zinc before having the best chance for conception.
8) Last but not least, get a second opinion. If something doesn’t feel right to you, it probably isn’t. I saw the second doctor after feeling like the first had missed something, and sure enough, they had. Same goes for holistic practitioners. Seek out the best for you.
*My first consultation with a fertility doctor returned these results:
Based on all of your tests, your ovarian reserve is very low: essentially you have an undetectable AMH level; very low ovarian volume (1.5cc, with the normal premenopausal volume 5cc); and 4 follicles, which is the median number for a 47 year old. You have had had several miscarriages since the birth of your second child, and recurrent miscarriage is often a sign of poor egg quality. Your FSH (not progesterone) was 44.6. Ideally, it should be less than 10.
I’m not saying that the birth of my baby was plausible, or even likely, I’m just saying it is possible, and that in my case my intuition was not mistaken.
This is my miracle baby. May this article help you meet yours.
Please write to me and tell me how you go, or comment below, I love hearing your stories and would be honoured if you feel like sharing it with me.
With love from this Soul Mamma
Alena Turley is a founder, mentor, ethical content creator and mother of three based on Sydney's Northern Beaches. She is equal parts loved and fired up to support mums in making deep and lasting changes inside and out. We at the Soul Mama Hub acknowledge the traditional custodians of the lands upon which we live, learn and create and invite you to feel deeply and tread lightly.